First time mom overwhelmed

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Posted By lynne on Apr 11, 2019

It does sound like you have postnatal depression. It seems like your inlaws are not helpful and this is added stress. Continue going to your psychologist, you can offload there, this is recommended in so many ways.. As regarding work, it is ok to tell them you are suffering from PND, you need the time to recover. This seems to be an added stressor to you. Your GP can give you a sicknote and until you feel that you are enjoying motherhood and life don't think about going back to work.. Try to socialise I know your baby is young but it will do you good to get out for a short walk with baby. Ask your PHN if there are any local support groups, mother and toddler groups or if you are breastfeeding a local breastfeeding group. Try to eat properly and sleep when baby is sleeping, not always easy but sleep is important. AS for your inlaws would they help with the baby while you and your husband get some time for each other. You are not a bad mother, no one is judging you, you are unwell and need help. It is not baby blues and it may be hormonal but 1 in 5 mothers experience PND. There are some online aps eg. mind the bump or go online to Beaumont hospital mindfulness centre where you can download mindfulness exercises that may help you. Nurture Health at info@nurturehealth.ie can be worth looking at too. Hope this helps, Congratulations on being a new mum. you will get better with help and support.

Posted By Anonymous on Apr 05, 2019

Hi just wondering if anyone else has experience like mine. I’m 13 weeks postpartum living abroad so away from family and friends. Feeling really down, emotional and even angry all the time. I’m so anxious all the time and can’t sleep properly no matter how tired I am. I love my baby but sometimes I wonder if my baby and husband would be better off without me. Everyone says use your motherly instincts but being honest sometimes I really don’t know what to do. My husband’s family have never accepted me and really made it very clear since our baby was born (it’s our first) that they only came to see the baby and my husband and were really rude to me. I’ve never done anything bad to them but it hurts now more than ever not that they don’t like but that they’ll never accept me. They’ve done some nasty things to me regarding our wedding beforehand and I really thought all this would be a fresh start if that makes sense? I feel terrible cause this upsets me so much more since I gave birth and it effects my husband. I finally went to my gp when I realised my feelings were not clearing up after a few weeks, she told me it’s common and sometimes due to hormonal changes. What can I do to treat this? She referred me to a psychologist so I can have someone to confide in and it helps a bit. I just feel so shitty and guilty cause I know there are so many people who are in horrible situations with terrible problems. I’m due to go back to work but I just can’t cope with it, I have to go see the company dr and I’m so nervous that yet again another person will judge me and think I’m so ungrateful for what I have and force me to go back to work. I can barely cope with being a mother

Posted By Anna on Apr 10, 2019

So sorry to hear you not well. PND causes you to be down, anxious and angry, lack of sleep is common. It is so upsetting not what we expect after giving birth. I remember feeling how my husband and child would be better off without me and of course this is not true as a Mum you are very important. You mention Motherly instinct that is something that dose not come out of the sky you just learn as you go along. So sad that your husbands family not accept you that is so hard. How does your Husband feel about this? Glad you finding Psychologist a help, its does help to share. It is really hard to have to go to work GP I remember that being so scary but just be yourself. I remember being so scared having to go back to work but I gave it a go as sometimes it can help getting out of the house and meeting your work colleges. Is there any way you could work a shorter week? Are you able to get out for a walk exercise really helps. CBT is also meant to be a great help

Posted By J2019 on Apr 10, 2019

Thank you for taking the time to read my message. My husband lost his mother 11years ago she passed away, so it’s the only family he has really and I think for him it’s unfair cause he’s then stuck in between even though I’d never expect him to take sides. It’s not his fault for their behaviour. I will see how it goes and thank you for the encouraging words it all seems a lot now but you seem to understand where I am coming from

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