Hi all, just need to get my feelings out. I have two beautiful girls, 4 and six months. I have my all to my first baby and just feel like I have nothing left to give to my second...which is just the most horrible feeling. I adore her but feel that she is being short changed as she isn't getting the same focus that my first had. I am trying to be all things to them both which I know rationally I can't. I feel like a failure of I am not on my 'A' game all the time and just can't seem to accept that it is ok to drop my standards. I am worrying about everything and can't live in the moment at all. I adore my girls so much and deep down know that I am doing a good job but just don't feel it. I am so afraid of letting them down and feel that I have because the doc has prescribed me meds. I just feel like a failure. They are both so good and that makes me feel even more inadequate because I feel that I'd have an excuse for feeling this way of that were difficult children. My biggest fear is that I will let them down by not giving them my all but as I said I don't feel I have anything left to give...which scares me so much. I feel so alone at the moment because my husband and everybody else keep telling me how great I am doing...which just mean it's true....right? So why can't I convince myself of this. I hate how I am feeling right now
Ann you are being so hard on yourself, you are not letting your kids down. It is hard being a Mum of 2 your torn every other way. Do you know there is no such thing as the perfect mother and you are putting yourself under so much pressure. Will you try and relax and take some time out for yourself, you sound exhausted. Your Husband is there to help so ask him for help....... enjoy your children they grow up so quick...
Thanks Sue. I am trying, I have been a week trying to take a bath!! I know rationally that I am doing a good job but have just gotten into this mindset and am doing everything possible to get out of it. I am meeting my PUB tomorrow in the hope that she can help me out things in perspective. I have always been hard on myself, much harder than I would be on anybody else...